i am on the tip of doing something really stupid. i knew he would have liked me again after what happened. and i didnt stop him. it is my fault. i dont know what to say. im not good with these things. how to reject people is not my thing, i cant even say no to people handing out flyers... fuck it. i remember confessing to someone and them saying no to me. straight to the heart even though i tried to act as cool as i can. I had noone to talk about it to, so i spoke to him about him. i would allow that to happen for mcmouny if he was able to distinguish between the care i am giving. i find the word friendzone deaming, and i dont like the use of it in its context. i want to truly and sincerely just listen to everything he has to say and knowing that he isnt the one for me. he wavered because we got close that night, he said he is moving on but it isnt true. i say that i am moving on, and then on that very night, me and vanny spent time together, doing intimate things, yet i did not hesitate to say i dont like him. that is the moment when you truly know you are able to move on. I honestly cant see my future with anyone right now. But for the time being, to keep myself occupied, lets just say i think i like todd. and let that be it. i dont want any hassle and trouble any gossip, i just want myself to know, i cant please everyone, and dont you, linda, ever consider giving up your happiness to satisfy others because in return, you will feel guilt of your own. Remember that feeling ? im sure you do. Where you were disgusted by everything you've done. Yes. Dont go back there.