Losing hope

So is this what it feels like to lose faith in everything you once believed in? I've always thought if something was meant to be, it'll happen. But as it seems, life just keeps proving me wrong over and over again. There is no love or trust, it's just all a cover up for all the evil in the world. Vanny fucked it up the first time, shahid added salt to my wound. Think it's not gonna heal in this lifetime.